Happy New Year!

Tomorrow is the ‘big day’ all around the world (at different times, obviously), but woo hoo it’s New Years Eve - the night of massive parties, celebration, lots of drinking and dancing drinking into the early morning.

Unless you are in America, that is…

One thing I have noticed is that American’s don’t really know how to party.  Now, I’ve never been to New York on New Years Eve, so it might be different on the east coast, but here in California it’s a bit of a dud.  In the last 20 years, I’ve been to a few New Years’ parties, but what really surprises me is that as soon as midnight strikes people generally say “Happy New Year” and then GO HOME!! Yes, really, midnight is not the start of the party like it is in England.  It’s most definitely the end. And that is if most people haven’t gone home well before midnight “to avoid the traffic and all the crazy drunk drivers.”  Party poopers!

But there are fireworks if you can get them (although illegal in most parts of California, people still manage to find them).  Then there are the guns.... people with guns who like to shoot into the air! You don't really want to be outside at the stroke of midnight for fear of being hit by a bullet falling from the sky.  

As we know, in England the whole of the country listens to Big Ben chime midnight to bring in the new year, but at least the whole country is in the same time zone.  What amazes me about living on the west coast is that Los Angeles does not have it’s own countdown clock.  Just before midnight the telly is turned on so everyone can watch the countdown and the ‘ball drop' in New York - which was recorded Three Hours earlier! I assume this is repeated a few times across the country in all the different time zones!  Just weird… and nobody cares!

It's a ball on a stick!

These are only my observations - perhaps the party in Vegas is a night long event, but the average Californian party in someone's house is not.

But I must admit, the best bit of living in California is that I get two New Years celebrations.  If I can manage to get to an English pub or bar as everyone gets to celebrate (and drink, of course) at 4:00 p.m. Because obviously, we have to celebrate with home ... Absolutely brilliant!  

So to everyone who reads the blog I would like to say HAPPY NEW YEAR wherever you are and however you celebrate.  

HAPPY NEW YEAR!

A Good Old English Christmas

There’s nothing better than the run up to Christmas in England…. The weather is cold (usually raining), the lights go up around town and the radio is filled with Christmas songs.  Bliss… and I may be fantasizing a bit about how nice it is, having been here over 20 years, but there are still things I miss.

This on the radio:

Or this

I haven’t actually heard these songs in years.  They are never, ever played in the US.  Instead we get stuff like Bing Crosby’s White Christmas and Frosty the Snowman.  Every now and then, I hear George Michael’s Last Christmas.  But you really only hear them if you are listening to a station that plays continuous Christmas music.

Christmas Specials on the Telly

I used to love to sit down at Christmas and watch the specials.  Only Fools & Horses was always particularly brilliant.  Blimey, even the soaps have a special on Christmas Day – you can always guarantee a shocker in Eastenders.  But here? Not a chance.  There may be a little mention of Christmas and perhaps some snow, but that’s about it.  And most of the programmes shown on Christmas day are repeats.

The Queen’s Speech

Yeah, nobody ever watches it but it’s more than likely on in the background.  I’m not saying I want to watch it, but it’s an English tradition, isn’t it?  I’m sure if I wanted to, I could find it on the internet somewhere, but really, I’m not that fussed.

Chocolate

Cadbury’s Selection Box was always a favourite for Christmas.  Could you imagine opening a present on Christmas morning and finding a bag of six or seven chocolate bars?  It would be a bit disappointing, not to say a bit lazy - but put them in a fancy box with a picture of Father Christmas on the front and they become extra special and the present everyone wants.

And what about Quality Street?  Do they even sell those big tins at any other time of the year?  They are a total necessity at Christmas and who doesn’t argue over the hazelnut in caramel (aka the purple one) or the gold toffee stick or toffee penny?  Nobody ever wanted the orange or strawberry crème and they would always be in the bottom of the tin until Easter when they were finally thrown away.

Mince Pies and Christmas Cake

What would it be like to have no mince pies?  Just ask me – bloody awful, that’s what.  There were a few years there when I couldn’t find them.  They are not a thing here.  Ask someone for a mince pie and the likely response is “Oh that pie with the kidneys you Brits eat? Eew”  (Yes, the eew is always at the end of that sentence.)   Um, nooo, that would be those scrummy fruit pies you eat with custard.  I have actually found a couple of specialist shops that sell them now, and I think last year they sold them at Fresh & Easy.

Christmas cake, to an American, is a dry, fruit concoction that gets passed around family and friends for years and nobody will eat it.  I’m not surprised, I wouldn’t eat a cake that’s years old either.  But when I tell them “our” Christmas cake is soft, moist and fruity with lots and lots of alcohol it gets a good reaction, especially when I tell them it stays in the cupboard for months after baking and Brandy is added every week or so.  What’s not to like about that?

American Fruitcake - Nope!

Boxing Day

Oh dear me.  This one is a killer.  Every year for the last 20 years I have had to beg and plead for the day off. Nobody cares [*sad face*].  Boxing Day (or as its known here, the day after Christmas) is when everyone says “well, that’s Christmas done and dusted, lets throw out the tree.”  (When they come home from work, that is).  A pretty sorry state of affairs.  Oh how I miss that day.  Even though I have actually managed to never work on the day, it’s just not the same.  You don’t get any more presents and you certainly don’t have cold turkey and piccalilli, mainly because you can’t get piccalilli anywhere. (Isn’t that a wonderful word… piccalilli – mainly pronounced here as Piccadilly by anyone with the slightest idea of what I’m talking about).

Oh and then there's the footie.  What would Boxing Day be like without a football match to go to, or at least watch on the telly?

Crackers

If you don’t sit around the table, pulling crackers, wearing a paper crown and telling silly jokes, you are not doing Christmas right.  And there’s an unwritten rule (in my family anyway) that you don’t pull the crackers until after the turkey, but before pudding.  That’s just how it is.

Not like the first time I cooked Christmas dinner for only my American friends.  I was devastated to realize nobody knew what a cracker was or what to do with them.  Can you imagine the look on my face when I realized people were shaking them, trying to look inside and actually pulling them on their own!  I’ve got to say, it wasn’t the best Christmas I’ve ever had and there may have been a moment when I lost my temper and I “might” have actually slapped someone for doing it wrong. Christmas officially ruined!

DO NOT DO THIS!

California at Christmas

It is certainly different in California at Christmas and sometimes a little bit weird.

Hot Weather

I never really thought about it, but California is hot, or at least a bit lot warmer than England at Christmas.  I always knew Australia has Christmas in the summer, but it had never occurred to me that December in California is just as sunny as any other day of the year.  Obviously there are parts where it gets cold and it snows, but down by Los Angeles, it’s pretty much warm all year.  It’s so strange to open presents and have the sun shining and to possibly eat your dinner on the patio [how fancy am I?]

Not quite this hot, but close - Happy Christmas!

Christmas Shopping

I’m sure everyone’s heard of the crazy Black Friday panic buying.  Well, I wasn’t prepared for it that first year (nor every year since actually).  It’s a crazy game nearly everyone plays.  And every year it’s getting earlier and earlier.  I tried it once…. I got up at what I thought was an unearthly hour of the morning, went to the shop where I had seen a laptop and when I arrived,  found there were about 300 people in line already!  I turned around, went home and got back into bed.  Needless to say, my daughter did not get a laptop that year and apparently, 6:00 a.m. is not too early, in fact, it’s quite positively late.

Christmas Eve

It seems to me that this is the day most people celebrate Christmas.  The family get together for a meal and…. to open presents!!  And I don’t understand what that’s all about.  Why would you open your presents the day before Christmas?  This may not be true about everyone, but I have heard from many, many people that they open at least one or two presents on Christmas eve.  How terrible - that would be like opening presents, well, before Christmas!  What happens on Christmas morning when you’ve got nothing to open?  Talk about spoiling the surprise and taking the fun out of Christmas morning.  Bah Humbug!

Christmas lights on palm trees

The first time I saw this, it was amazing.  California had been so very hot since we had arrived in August and in about November the lights started to go up.  It was quite a surprise and also quite nice. I don’t know what I thought would happen, but Christmas lights on palm trees was a nice touch.

Pretty

Christmas Lights on houses
And then there’s this…..

Crazy

That first year we were here was so eye opening.  Everything was different and strange and sometimes down right weird.  The whole Christmas light phenomenon was crazy.  At the end of November our neighbours began putting lights up.  Nothing wrong with that, we thought.  It will look nice and christmassy, we thought. Oh, that’s quite a few lights, we thought.  When are they going to stop putting lights up?, we thought.  Oh bloody hell, what have they done, we thought!!! [*sigh*]

Every day we would come home from work and there would be more lights – not just on the house, but on the trees, the bushes, around the windows, on the door – you name it, it was covered in lights. Even blow up animals, snowmen, father Christmases, etc, etc., etc…. on the front lawn.  On and on, it was endless.  But it was definitely a talking point!  

I have not joined the over-the-top house decoration contest, but I will admit occasionally we have a Father Christmas on a Harley Davidson in our front garden.  And why not??

An Unfortunate Innuendo

When my son progressed into a "big boy's" bed, he had this duvet cover, which was handed down to my daughter and subsequently was brought to the US with us.  [Obviously his was blue, not pink].

The dog's name was Snatch and he had a cat friend called Hatch.  Emblazoned across the side and bottom of the cover were the words "Snatch & Company."

I really quickly found out that in America snatch has an entirely different meaning - needless to say, I made sure those covers were not on the bed if my daughter invited friends for a sleepover!

I'm just glad Snatch was the dog and not the cat.... that would have been a whole other kind of unfortunate innuendo.

Did anyone else have these sheets??  

My Dirty Little Thanksgiving Secret

Here’s my secret – although people who know me might already guess this …..

[*whispering*] I don't particularly like Thanksgiving!!

Oh no, I hear the cry… why ever not?  You must like Thanksgiving, it’s an American Tradition, it's the best meal of the year!  Well, let me explain

Turkey

While I love, love, love turkey, it’s a traditional Christmas dinner and something I look forward to all year. I appreciate many American’s don’t do the family thing at Christmas, but in England it’s a big deal. Turkey with all the trimmings – roast potatoes, chipolata sausages, Yorkshire pudding, carrots, broccoli, gravy and of course, Brussels sprouts – is the perfect Christmas dinner. So to have turkey a few weeks before Christmas takes all the thrill out of it. It’s kind of like opening all your presents before Christmas and then having no surprises on Christmas morning.

All the Trimmings
Ahh yes, all the trimmings, American style…

1. Sweet potato – what the heck is this stuff?  It’s sweet, it’s orange and it’s definitely not a potato. (okay, it might be, but I'm not an expert)  Not only that – it’s usually topped with marshmallows.  Ugh, sweet and savoury should never, ever go on the same plate;

I have no words

2. Mashed potatoes – nope, no lovely, crispy roast potatoes but mashed.  And mashed is kind of a subjective word because most likely there will be lumps and skin in there.  Reminds me of icky school mashed potatoes.  Sometimes, there’s even garlic or some other concoction of flavours added.  I'm a purist when it comes to mashed potatoes, no lumps, no skin, no flavours except potato - it probably has to do with having a former Irish mother-in-law.

Lumpy potato

      3.      Ambrosia Salad – okay, this is where things get really weird. Ambrosia is a so-called salad which in my opinion, it most definitely is not. Mandarin oranges, pineapple, coconut, mini marshmallows and whipped topping is not my idea of a salad. A pudding (dessert) maybe but never a main meal – and to top if off, you have to eat it on the same plate as your turkey! Holy crap that’s so wrong – see number 1 above.

Nope - Definitely a pudding

        4.      Green Bean Casserole – I will admit I really like this, but at the end of the day, it’s just a tin of runner beans mixed with a tin of mushroom or chicken soup and some crunchy onions. It is the best part of the meal, actually and I tend to eat more of this than anything.

My favourite part

5. Vegetables – oh wait, there are no vegetables really.  Sometimes there might be carrots, but then they’re covered in sugar and probably marshmallows too.

Pudding (“Dessert” if you’re America)

What no Christmas pudding or mince pies?  Of course not – it’s not Christmas, even though your're eating Turkey!

Pick your punishment preference:

Pumpkin pie – I’m sure pumpkins are not made for eating, otherwise why would the flavour have to be totally concealed in cinnamon or nutmeg.  Not to mention the texture is awful.

Apple Pie – oh yes, something I recognize.  Wait, it’s so over seasoned with cinnamon that it doesn’t even taste like apple pie.

Pecan Pie – I have no comment on this one.  I’ve tried a pecan once and it was awful.  I’m sure there are at least two or three spoons of cinnamon in there too.

Sweet Potato Pie – Wait, didn’t we just have this with our dinner?  And it looks suspiciously similar to pumpkin pie.

Ok, I will admit and you might have noticed I don’t like cinnamon and the problem in America, especially this time of year, is that it’s so overwhelming in everything.  I think I will stick with the Ambrosia salad as my pudding, thank you.  (Although it’s usually cleaned away by the time you get to desert).

Awkwardness

So here’s the thing, it seems that no matter where you go, you have to do the whole “go around the table and give thanks thing.”  Everyone has to take turns saying what they are thankful for and of course, it’s a time you are in the spotlight (kind of) and all eyes are on you.  I’ve said things like “I’m thankful I didn’t have to do the cooking,” which I’m not entirely sure is what is expected.

Also, sometimes, there’s praying!  I know, I shouldn’t say bad things about praying, but it just makes me cringe and feel really uncomfortable.  There's also hand-holding sometimes.  And heaven forbid (yes, I said it) that I’m  actually asked to say the prayer!

So how do I get around this, being engaged to a wonderful Yank you say?

Well, sometimes I just have to suck it up and eat the turkey.  But, for the last couple of years, we’ve been to Las Vegas for Thanksgiving and it works out absolutely brilliantly.  We go to a buffet and he can get his Thanksgiving meal with all the trimming and I can have bloomin’ Chinese food if I feel like it, or Mexican, or Italian, or anything I want without ruining my Christmas.

Oh yes, and I forgot about the worst part - there are no presents!!!  You see, Christmas is so MUCH better.

Gambling - A Great British Tradition?

The very first time we came to America to have a look at what we were getting ourselves into, my dad took us to Las Vegas – of course! Everyone has to experience Vegas at least once in their life. It was all very exiting!

So there we were, all packed into the car like sardines yet again, when we decided to stop for a late lunch at Stateline.  Now, as we came over the hill, I thought we were actually in Vegas – all I could see were casinos and lights.  But apparently not, Stateline is just a little teaser of what’s to come.

The buffet was calling our name and there was quite a wait, but hey, we were in a real casino so let’s gamble…. Or at least let’s feed a few pennies into a fruit machine.

So while the others were queuing up, I tootled off to the closest machine and began shoving quarters in one at a time.  A couple of minutes later, I hit it big…. Well, okay, I won about $50.  Nice - or it was, until I was suddenly surrounded by security guards.  Hmm… it turns out you can’t have a child in a Casino, or at least not next to the machines.  I was grilled as to who had put the money in the slot and why my son was with me (he had followed me over to the machine).  It was a wonderful introduction to the American world of gambling, I must say.  I think they only relented and let me keep the money because I was a tourist!  I sheepishly collected my winnings and did the walk of shame back to the family.  *sigh* They told me during lunch that if I’d put three quarters in at the same time, I could have won a bundle… but try explaining that to the security guards – I was happy to settle for the $50.

Although gambling is legal under US federal law, Nevada and Lousiana are the only states where casinos are legal statewide.  Other states have laws which restrict gambling to small geographic areas or to American Indian reservations. [Wikipedia.org] If you want to gamble, you have to really, really want to gamble because you will have to travel quite a distance (unless you already live in Vegas, of course).  The laws are extremely strict and heaven forbid if you’re under 21 and are caught trying to gamble or even walk into a casino on your own.  Gambling is a bit taboo in the US, mummies (or mommies) wouldn't dare let their child gamble - it's a big no-no, as if they will immediately be on the slippery slope to Gamblers Anonymous!

It’s a far cry from growing up in England where every seaside pier has an arcade choc-a-block with fruit machines, every pub and most chip shops have them too.  And anyone can play.  Here’s an example - my four year old nephew gambling away his pocket money in Brighton.

A big no-no in America

This is just something we do.  Growing up, if we knew we were going to the seaside, we would save all our 1p’s, 2p’s and 5p’s so we could go on the pier and – shock horror – gamble.  And blimey, us Brits gamble on anything – Horse racing, football scores, the elections, the weather, a white Christmas… you name it, and we’ll bet on it.  You can even see grannies having a flutter on the Grand National every year - its an English tradition.  Every corner has either a pub, a newsagents, a chippy or a betting shop.  A good Saturday night out for us was going to Wimbledon Stadium for the greyhound racing and letting my son pick the winners (or at least try to) and nobody worried about it!

Come on 6......

Although, there was that one time…..

I had been asked to put some money on a horse and went to the bookies with my 3 year old in tow. We were just in time for the race to begin so we stayed to watch.  To my utmost horror my son decided at that moment to stand on a chair and shout “Come on 6… Come on 6….” at the top of his voice, a result of  too many trips to Wimbledon, possibly.  The old fuddy duddies in the shop were not best pleased and we were asked to leave.  And once again I had to do the walk of shame…..  [is it just me or is this becoming a regular thing?]

Christmas in November!

After our very first Christmas here, I was absolutely gutted to see our next door neighbors' Christmas tree out for the dustbin men on Boxing Day!!!.... yes, the day after Christmas (as it’s called here) is just another day to Americans.  Can you imagine taking down all your decorations on Boxing Day. Bloody hell, we’re still celebrating in England, going to the other in-laws and wot-not. There’s still pressies to be had.  I want to stretch my Christmas celebrations out to at least New Years Eve!

And I know people are putting lights up on their houses earlier and earlier recently, but I came home the other day (it was November 2nd) and saw this...

Yes, my neighbours have their Christmas tree up already!  I almost died.  [Not the best picture obviously, because I was fainting when I took it]