Dear America,
Something has been bothering me for a while now. Why are your toilets so low to the ground? And why, oh why, is the gap under the door so
big? That gap is huge for heaven's sake! I’m sure other people using the toilets can
see my knees - it’s very unnerving. I don’t want complete strangers to see all my
unmentionables. [And I won't even mention the gaps around the door]
The first restaurant toilet (or restroom) I ever used in the USA was
an experience, to say the least. First
of all, it was all fancy and had wallpaper and dimmed lights, very
soothing. Then there were the toilet
seat covers. Wow, a little cover to put
on the seat, how very civilized.
But then I went to sit down… Oh, it was so very low. I fell so fast I firmly hit my bum on the
seat and I think my derriere nearly hit
the water. What a shock – I think my
feet came off the floor too! Nobody
warned me that the toilets were so low. Now
I see why you have the seat covers – you can’t do the “squat” that we ladies
have all perfected in England, you have
to sit on a public seat. Eeeww. And with your knees up to your chin no less!
[I tried the squat a few times and trust me, unless you're a gymnast with legs of steel, the toilets are way too low for you to hold that squat long enough to completely empty your bladder]
[I tried the squat a few times and trust me, unless you're a gymnast with legs of steel, the toilets are way too low for you to hold that squat long enough to completely empty your bladder]
So obviously, I inevitably went back to England for a visit and totally forgot
how high the toilets were over there. I
did the whole thing in reverse and ended up on the seat with a thud and Oh Good
Grief… they don’t have seat covers!!!
So thank you, thank you America for making me all germophobic
and paranoid. I’m beginning to feel like
I should take a tape measure into the toilet with me so I can measure the height before I
sit.
Yours faithfully,
TheGobbyBrit
Which way round? |
P.S. Oh, by the way,
which way around does the toilet seat cover go?
Does the little flap thingy go in the back or in the front?? After 20 years, I still can’t figure it out.
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